New Year

Here it is…2019, 365 days of fresh new days to write your story. I spent my New Years with some friends at a quiet house party. It was fun. What wasn’t fun was after everyone got drunk they decided it was a good time to do an intervention about my suicide attempt in October. By …

Advertisements

All the Pills

Let’s add another pill. When that one doesn’t work, let’s add another pill! I am starting to feel like my body is solely function on the medications I am putting into it. Mind you, I need these medications to function, but none the less it is frustrating when you have to add another pill to …

Depression

It’s hard for you on the outside to watch someone suffer, to offer help and not be able to.  To look at someone and think they are fine only to learn later that they were anything but fine.  To struggle with someone in your life who is chronically depressed and to never know when they …

Coming off Effexor

Coming off of Effexor won’t be easy, it needs to be done slowly and the side effects won’t be great. NO JOKE! I was expecting the medicine heady feeling that I got when I skipped a dose or the unbearable starving/vomitty feeling that I became accustomed to when I first started the medicine ages ago.  …

Silence

A smile so contagious a bad day could not be had Even in the moments when there were tears streaming down your face Even in the moments when I was terrorized by my nightmares Your smile could save me Pure lust and unadulterated need flowed freely from the soft touch of your lips to my …

Okay

Every day is a struggle.  To wake up and crawl out of bed and go about the day.  Everyday I have to tell myself that effort will be worth it, that something good will come out of this life if I keep living it.  I have to remind myself that I have responsibilities outside my …